What a beautiful feeling it is to think you’ve made it and are leveled with your partner, until you are shown you’re not. What a heart breaking feeling it is to have that glass house shattered by few words said by your partner. Oh what a feeling. I have anger problems from time to time. … Continue reading In the Dirt
Tag: Shame
Remember Remember the 22nd of November
So of course today is November 21, but my lovely brain decided to freak out a whole week and now a day before the dreadful day. Tomorrow marks the day of the first and most impactful and traumatizing day that my ex-husband put his hands on me. It all started when we were supposed to … Continue reading Remember Remember the 22nd of November
Numb
I am faced with the same situation, emotionally. There are so many thoughts running through my head, yet I feel nothing. Yesterday did it for me. I hit the “enough is enough”. I’m over it. I have tried so hard to be open-minded, non judgemental, and understanding, but it seems like that’s no enough. I … Continue reading Numb
I thought…
I thought this time would be different. I thought maybe he would be the one to prove my fears wrong. I thought I could finally enjoy life instead of simply living in it. I thought this time it would be different... but all good things must come to an end, right? My biggest fear after … Continue reading I thought…
Past or History?
We all live in a world were memories are made each and every second we are alive. Some are good. Some are bad. Some are forgotten. Some will live with you for the rest of your life. Some will affect you everyday. Some will affect you sometimes. Some can easily destroy you from within whether … Continue reading Past or History?
When Love Came to Kill Us All
Some of y’all may know who Jessie Reyes is and some may not. In short, she is of Columbia descent but raised in Canada by her parents who relocated there before she was born. I bring this up because “When Love Came to Kill Us All” is the title of her album, which she released … Continue reading When Love Came to Kill Us All
The Turning Point
Around this time, two years ago, I received one of the most painful injuries from my then husband. I don’t remember much, but I do remember he was drunk as a skunk. Wait, never-mind. I remember now. He said, he was going to stop drinking (for who knows, the 10th millionth time maybe). I was … Continue reading The Turning Point
Realization
I saw a post done by a local artist from Massachusetts on Instagram. It read something like, sometimes I feel small, very small and unimportant. I immediately liked it and shared it on the story, which can be found if you scroll all the way down. But what really stuck with me is the simple … Continue reading Realization
Waking Up
You know for some waking up is just annoying because they want 10 more minutes of sleep or an hour or just want to sleep in and get up when they feel like it. Some of us don’t want to wake up because we want to be dead or kinder words would be don’t want … Continue reading Waking Up
Hamster Wheel
You ever feel like you’re just running in circles? Ever feel like you’re stuck in a cycle with no way out? Ever feel like no matter what turn you take it always leads to a dead end? I’ve been doing good, you know. It’s been exactly a week without thoughts of harming myself. It’s been … Continue reading Hamster Wheel