Hopelessness is the worst feeling in the world, honestly. I’ve felt hopeless once before and that was after separating from my ex-husband and drowning in debt, stress, paranoia, hurt, mental and physical exhaustion. When I no longer felt a reason to live. When I felt alone in this huge ass world. When I felt ashamed … Continue reading Hopelessness
Tag: truth
You Never Know What You Have
For a couple of months now, I've been having an internal war with between my brain and my heart. After my ex-husband, I told myself I would never allow myself to feel the same way because of someone else. So every time Danny and I would get into an argument over something that was brought … Continue reading You Never Know What You Have
In the Dirt
What a beautiful feeling it is to think you’ve made it and are leveled with your partner, until you are shown you’re not. What a heart breaking feeling it is to have that glass house shattered by few words said by your partner. Oh what a feeling. I have anger problems from time to time. … Continue reading In the Dirt
Coming Out
I haven't really thought about this for a very long time because quite honestly it just never comes up. Last night, while in my boyfriend's family group chat, his niece came out as being bisexual and some were laughing because we weren't sure if it was a joke or she was being serious. I didn't … Continue reading Coming Out
Remember Remember the 22nd of November
So of course today is November 21, but my lovely brain decided to freak out a whole week and now a day before the dreadful day. Tomorrow marks the day of the first and most impactful and traumatizing day that my ex-husband put his hands on me. It all started when we were supposed to … Continue reading Remember Remember the 22nd of November
Simple Complicated
I don’t ask for much. I’m simple, complicated. Let me explain. I’m simple to the point that all I ever really want from anything or anyone is time and attention. If we’re hanging out I expect for you to be present, in the moment, paying attention, making memories to remember them, share and revisit at … Continue reading Simple Complicated
Numb
I am faced with the same situation, emotionally. There are so many thoughts running through my head, yet I feel nothing. Yesterday did it for me. I hit the “enough is enough”. I’m over it. I have tried so hard to be open-minded, non judgemental, and understanding, but it seems like that’s no enough. I … Continue reading Numb
Happy
This weekend was huge. I have officially met all of my boyfriend's direct family members and he is definitely the black sheep, but in a great way. Every time we have a discussion, disagreement or misunderstanding we always come out better. Stronger. What brings me even more happiness is seeing how much I've grown since … Continue reading Happy
Past or History?
We all live in a world were memories are made each and every second we are alive. Some are good. Some are bad. Some are forgotten. Some will live with you for the rest of your life. Some will affect you everyday. Some will affect you sometimes. Some can easily destroy you from within whether … Continue reading Past or History?
Am I Selfish?
I purposely question and make a point to let others know that it’s okay if they don’t mean or feel a type of way, because it helps me defer the smallest thought or glimpse of hope that someone may actually care about me in any shape or form. It’s called deflecting and it’s my way … Continue reading Am I Selfish?
